I suggested that she put the rental charges on her credit card until my investigation was complete. I remember her hesitation when she admitted that her credit card was maxed out.

My first thought was that she was financially irresponsible. Eventually I realized this public school teacher had no financial cushion. She was just starting out and could only qualify for a modest credit card limit, which was exhausted due to unexpected mechanical work performed on her car a month before the accident. The decision to not have rental car coverage was purely financial — she was on a tight budget.

I learned that many responsible people live paycheck to paycheck. Some of them teach our children, clean our restrooms and make our fancy morning coffees. Many who make a modest income work just as hard as those who earn far more. Sometimes people who work become unable to or lose their jobs. Even responsible people struggle sometimes.

In claims, patience and listening can be important to obtaining a positive outcome in a difficult situation. (Photo: iStock)

It's okay to let your heart show

The first fatality claim I handled involved a head-on collision in Mexico. The driver and front seat passenger were killed, but a young woman asleep in the back seat walked away with only two broken ribs.

Investigating a claim in a remote area of another country can be tricky, especially when the party who crossed into the opposing lane fled the scene, and the police investigation hardly resembles what we are accustomed to in the United States. Determining the exact location of the accident was critical because a condition of the policy was that the accident did not occur beyond the policy territory of 150 miles from the U.S. border. There was also an issue of how to allocate the policy limits given the disparate and multiple claims.

The front seat passenger was a young man named Neal. At 24, he was a year older than me. My first contact in connection with his claim came from his mother. His father was over-whelmed by the death of his son, so his mother was my only contact.

Neal's mother asked me whether she should hire an attorney. I can't recall what I said, but it wasn't my place to guide her on this point. The ultimate issues: 1. Where did the accident take place, and 2. How would the limits be divided for the deaths of two young people and the relatively minor injuries of a third, would become clear soon enough.

I made many calls to Neal's mother to keep her apprised of the progress. I was always professional, but I never hesitated to engage on a heart level.

Eventually we settled the claim directly with Neal's mother, who received the maximum amount under the policy.

Related: 7 steps to paying the right amount for bodily injury claims

A few weeks after the claim resolved, Neal's mother sent me a thank you note with a picture of Neal, a handsome young man with curly brown hair and dark eyes. I have kept that note as a reminder that even in business, it's acceptable to let your heart show.

While it can be challenging at times, thoughtfully and deliberately listening to every voice often yields the just result. (Photo: iStock)

Listen to every voice

After working for several years in claims, I shifted my focus to work as an insurance defense attorney.

In one of my first trials, a low-impact auto case, I went up against a prominent veteran of the American Board of Trial Advocates (ABOTA), who was also a well-known figure in the local plaintiffs' bar. The case was way below her skill level, but she wanted to send a message to the equally prominent insurance company that hired me – do not to take these types of cases to trial.

My client was a young Vietnamese man who did not speak English so I had to utilize an interpreter. He was quite shy, not well-educated and very deferential toward me as his lawyer. During breaks he would walk a few steps behind me in the courthouse hallways and I had to stop and wait for him so we could walk side-by-side.

Related: Focusing on the future

He was easily flustered by even the simplest of questions and the use of an interpreter created even more complexity. He had a difficult time connecting with the jury, especially compared to the plaintiffs, who were two American-born men in their 20s, one of whom was a U.S. Marine.

In closing arguments, plaintiffs' counsel said my client appeared equivocal on the facts. She also mentioned that he did not make direct eye contact with her — clearly a sign he was being deceptive. In my closing I suggested that the jury listen to my client's words through the interpreter. I added that in some cultures, a young man does not look a mature woman in the eye out of respect for her, just as he may choose to walk behind his counsel out of respect. (I knew many jurors had observed us walking the hallways during breaks.)

I prevailed because of the facts. The jury discarded the bias opposing counsel tried to foment. They “heard” my client's voice and did the right thing.

There is often a lot of noise that distracts us when adjusting claims. While it can be challenging at times, thoughtfully and deliberately listening to every voice often yields the just result.

Claims people are not nurses or social workers, but with an open mind and an open heart, we have the ability help others in extraordinary ways and become better people in the process.

Related: For one young insurance agent, dispelling sterotypes is part of the job

Marcy Tieger is managing director of Symphony Advisors, www.symphonyadvisors.com, a consulting firm that provides operational, strategic and marketing advisory services to automobile insurance claims organizations and to the automotive aftermarket. Opinions expressed in this article are the author's own.