In your struggle to win sales, when you earn second place, you get nothing … nada … the big goose egg … And it's possible that once that client is locked up with your competing vendor, they may never relinquish that relationship, and that relationship may never come up for bid again.

So, how do you avoid this harsh reality and always finish first? The truth is you can't.

It's time to build what our colleague, Kendall Colman, calls your “rejection muscle” because rejection is going to happen. In fact, in the sales world, you will likely find that you will be told “no” way more often than not. Even if you have a relatively high closing ratio of 20% to 30%, this means that you are being told “no” 70% to 80% of the time.

Now that you are comfortable with the fact that you are going to be told “no,” it's time to consider some ways to handle this rejection:

1. Understand that “no” is not negative, it's only feedback

Life is neutral. The only one who is placing a label on this event is you.

2. Labels are sticky

Once a rejection occurs, it's easy to move the label from the event to then labeling ourselves by saying: “I suck … I am a terrible sales person … I am such a loser… Why would anyone buy from me?”

Breathe and stop with the labels. Instead, interrupt that thinking with: “It's just experience.”

3. Reflection is not just a three-syllable word

Most sales people make the same mistakes over and over again because they never ask themselves or their customers what they could have done differently. Prospects when asked, many times, will be incredibly open with you about the reasons why they chose a competitor.

Make friends with your competitors. (Photo: Thinkstock)

4. Embrace being in second place

We once visited a coffee roaster who said, “Our Company likes being No. 2. We know that our competitor's best clients are just one mistake away from calling us.”

Never burn a bridge … keep in contact with them (but avoid the “just checking-in call”), keep visiting with them at networking events and act as their resource broker (see below).

5. Be a resource broker

Want the fastest way to become No. 1? Send your prospect “a trickle” of contacts that they need to know either personally or professionally. It's almost guaranteed that no one else is doing this.

6. Realize you are not the “Godfather”

In the movie, The Godfather Part II, Michael Corleone famously mumbles, “Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.” Remember: the workplace is not the mafia.

Make friends with your competitors. This may go against every dog-eat-dog, business-world, Spidey-sense you have, but remember, your competitors are just like you.

At times, they are overwhelmed, not every customer fits their business model, they need the help of outside expertise, and who knows, they may even be in need of a sub-contractor from time to time. And if they don't know, like, and trust you, they won't call you.

Related: 65 motivational quotes to ignite your insurance sales

So here's the point, remember that when you say “YES” to one customer, you are saying “no” to 10 other possible customers. Yes, there are customers you consider whales or elephants, but ultimately, our global economy is built with literally more possibilities than you could pursue in 100 lifetimes.

According to a Dun and Bradstreet article from 2013, there were 235 million companies across 200 countries of the world. Based on the 5 rejections you received today, you only have 234,999,995 more companies to go. The possibilities are limitless.

Are you following us on Facebook?