I recently purchased a new home. Part of that process involved filling out a mortgage application. I was overnighted a 15-page form that looked like it had been created on a pre-IBM Selectric typewriter. My first thought was to wonder why any financial services institution would not distribute these things as a form-enabled PDF. Heck, even the IRS gives you PDFs where you can fill in the blanks. (The flip side of that is the IRS then automatically can extract your information from that PDF.)

Nevertheless, I wanted the house, so over lunch one day I filled out the stupid application form. What the mortgage company didn't realize is I was the only child in my sixth-grade class who failed to get a Peterson writing certificate; I am terminally lazy, and I hate to fill out forms. Why should I bother to look up the exact balance due on my car loan when the mortgage company was going to look it up anyway? But I did my duty and returned a totally illegible form by return overnight mail.

Ten days later I received a copy of the application with all of my information typed in. The company didn't offshore this typing, either–I know it was done by workers in a downtown office because they would call me every day or so to clarify an item. For example, they provided a list of credit cards and their balances they had fetched from the credit bureau. They wanted to know why I hadn't listed the amount under revolving credit. I explained it wasn't revolving because they all would be paid before any interest became due. Furthermore, the charges on those credit cards already were reflected in my estimate of monthly expenses. I use "rewards" credit cards to pay living expenses and then pay that amount before the due date. Lots of people do this, but apparently mortgage lenders don't understand the concept. If my monthly electric bill is paid by credit card, it counts against my credit worthiness twice: once as a monthly expense and once as a balance on a credit card. If the bill is just sitting on my desk as an account payable, it is counted only as a liability one time. Go figure.